Unfortunately in the last few years I have come in contact with some of the worst clients I have ever met. 25 years in this industry and I have to say I am appalled at by the behavior that some find acceptable these days. Before my return from my 3 year hiatus, I had not had any encounters with anyone that turned violent or that had done the type of things that I have experienced in these last 2 and a half years. I will also say, on the other hand, I have met some genuinely kind souls with hearts of gold and have felt treated like the queen I know I am. I'll say more about that later....
I returned to this work in March 2021 and things started off great. I started touring and visited New York for my first time ever. The city was beautiful and I had a wonderful time, except for all of the fantasy bookers, and time wasters. I have had quite a few silly texts, phone calls, and emails over the years, but not blatant endless wild goose chases like I encountered on my trip. Texts asking for multi-hour bookings-with screening info-that ended in me waiting outside for an uber for over an hour in my Jimmy Choos, moving from one corner to the other to find this illusive, imaginary uber. Turning down inquiries for someone to no show or cancel last minute, after paying $$$$ for a hotel. And THIS is why deposits came in to play.
Then came my trip to Los Angeles in February 2022. That actually went amazing until it went bad. Now this was nothing to do with clients and was a total accident, but nonetheless was a terrible experience. Halfway into my visit during a photo shoot in my hotel, I slipped and fell and broke my arm. Literally snapped in half. Now some of you may know, I am actually a hairstylist and work in a salon, so this not only put a damper on my trip. It put a hold on my life as I knew it. I went through surgery and ended up with a metal plate and 7 screws in my humerus bone. This was the most painful thing I have to say I have ever experienced, and I have had 2 children and multiple surgeries in my life including a spinal surgery in 2018. I also was flooded with love from some of the most caring, generous people in this community. Folks sent funds throughout my recovery, checked on me, and helped support me in ways I couldn't have imagined. It took a few months, lots of physical therapy, endless love from my peers and loyal clients, a few complications, and then I was back in the salon and taking bookings in May.
Next stop was in June 2022 to San Jose and Oakland where I had honed in on my screening and deposit techniques and was able to have a successful and enjoyable tour. There was push-back on my screening and more on the deposits, but I pushed through and had an amazing time. I ate at some of the most decadent restaurants, met some of the most gracious clients, had two hot duos with two different mega babes, and fully felt like things were turning the corner and looking up.
I was back in Seattle, enjoying being back behind the chair, back in my studio setting up my kink space, seeing all my lovely regular friends, and meeting new ones along the way. In July I was contacted by someone who found me on twitter. We will call him "Chuck." Chuck surprised me by flying out to Seattle from the most southern part of the country and booked a fabulous dinner and extended date. We had a wonderful time and I was very smitten to say the least. He sent a fabulous gift soon after our time together and showed his appreciation to me with generosity and thoughtfulness for the next month. More about Chuck later....
Then I planned my Vegas tour. I was all set for mid September 2022 and was contacted by a man with a very specific fetish. Screening went through and we set it up. I arrived and he immediately wanted to meet. After freshening up and getting ready for the night of debauchery, I met him in the lobby of my hotel. We said our hello's and went up to my room. We planned to be together overnight and possibly meet up again later in my trip. Well things went absolutely terrible. I spent 24 hours with a man who not only reversed payment he made to me, he got on my phone and did some scamming and dropped my credit score-which I have since repaired. When I caught on to him, he became violent and trashed my hotel and stormed out. Then came the threats and trying to extort me. He told me he was going to turn me in if I didn't send him 5k by midnight. I didn't, I'm not that dumb...He continued to tell me he was going to come to my room with 5 friends and gang rape and kill me. I had already changed rooms right when he left, so I knew that I was mostly safe. But being in a city I didn't know well and he was local, I was still a bit terrified. I didn't involve police for a few reasons. 1. I'm a hooker 2. I was at the beginning of my tour and had other sessions/deposits booked 3. I'm a hooker 4. He said he was friends with police and ex-military 5. I'm a hooker. So basically I had to get myself together and finish my tour. It was not easy. I was thankful to have met another provider that came to support me and I hope to be a forever friend! Thank you to Nicki!! If you are ever in Vegas, contact Nicki Esperanza and treat her with all the love and generosity! She is a true gem. And now more on my old friend Chuck....
I had tweeted about my Vegas encounter with the scammer from hell and Chuck reached out. He had lots of advice for me throughout the experience and then we planned our next get together. His birthday was at the end of October so we decided on San Francisco for Halloween. What better place to be?! We both were so excited planning our costumes and he bought my sexy red devil dress and everything was set. BUT I made a huge mistake. I didn't get a deposit. I paid for my flight and hotel-that we actually decided on together-and went to SF to see him. I trusted him. Why should I need a deposit? Here's why. He cancelled on me a couple hours before. Said his dad was sick and he needed to fly home. Ok. I told him to take care of what he needed to do and not to worry. He said, "Don't worry, I'll take care of you." Now to me that means he is going to pay. Nope, never. After a few texts, one call where he said he would make it right, and several unanswered dms-not a damn thing. I was out $2500 for the room and flights. 5k for the time we planned and who knows how many missed inquiries I missed in Seattle and could have taken in SF if he had not confirmed the night before and morning of our date. So yeah. DEPOSITS ARE NECESSARY! Even when you know each other already. Thanks to Chuck and all the fantasy bookers these days, deposits are 100% required to see me.
Back in Seattle seeing my lovely friends-kinksters, lovers, hair clients, romantics, newbies, oldies, goodies and everything in between-I was having a blast. One thing was getting to me. The clouds, the grey. I have lived in Seattle for most of my life and was craving the sun. I did spend 1994-2001 in Los Angeles and knew I missed the sun but also knew I didn't want to live in LA again.
Trigger warning for this next part. Violence-this was very hard for me to write.
Sooooo, I planned a trip to check out San Diego for my birthday in May 2023. Maybe I would move there? I posted up a tour and headed to the sunshine. I met 2 lovely clients and then was inundated with texts from guys declining screening. Well, shit! I was a few days into my trip and started to think ok, well maybe it's different here and I need to be more lenient. I accepted a date from someone I didn't screen other than running his phone # and came up with nothing bad. Hotel costs were weighing on me and I thought what the hell? BAD BAD BAD choice! He came to see me and I went through my boundaries with him and things seemed ok. We were getting to know each other, things were heating up and then he crossed a boundary. I explicitly told him NO CHOKING, He put his hand on my throat, I told him no. He stopped and said "Oh, sorry." We continued to do what adults do behind closed doors. And then, again, his hand gripped me around my throat. I tried to get away and I think that enraged him. He took his other hand and back handed me harder than I have ever been hit in my life. I was in complete shock. I didn't even feel any pain. I just felt something dripping from my chin. I touched my eye and looked down at my hand covered in blood. I look up and he's got his pants back on and going through my purse. He grabbed my phone and all the cash I had and ran off. I look down and there was blood everywhere. I go to the mirror and am horrified. I have a gash below my left eye that is pouring out blood. I know this may seem vain, but my face is one of the things I love the most about myself-physically. I take pride in looking this good. At 43, I have taken care, invested into, and loved my face for all these years. And in a matter of seconds someone took away not only a piece of something I love and care for, he took my ability to trust, feel safe, sleep at night, and my livelihood. April 28 2023 I lost a lot of hope.
Now let's talk about the aftermath-the good stuff! The amount of providers that sent love to me through messages, financial help, and pure goodwill and care was overwhelming. I know without this community I would not have made it. The outpouring of love from clients and fans was also immensely beautiful. It was the hardest thing I have been through in this work, but also the most love I have ever felt and truly was my reason for being able to see that this work is something I do love and I don't want to leave it. Not for some raged asshole with a passion for hurting women. BUT I cannot and will not ever be able to see anyone without proper screening and a deposit. EVER.
After my attack I decided to look at apartments and found my new home in San Diego. I went back to Seattle and packed up and headed to my new home. So here I am, but things are slow, and the screening and deposit push-back continues. Due to this and being in new city, I have decided to focus on my hair stylist career. I am starting over and having to rebuild my clients in the salon after living in the same city and doing hair for 15 yrs. I have accepted 2 stylist positions and am going to be working 6 days/week for awhile while I build. We will see how it goes, but for now I am only available for in person sessions in the evenings with pre-booking strongly advised. I am looking forward to dinner dates, shows, kinky and passionate pegging, and being spoiled by clients that are happy to screen, send my deposit and ready for a night to remember. I am also available virtually. You can find me on onlyfans, occasionally on sextpanther/textpanther, and my email is open for questions and ways to connect.
Please understand and respect all of our boundaries and requirements. There are reasons behind it all and there is a provider for everyone. If you find someone you want to meet, don't push boundaries, haggle rates, or be disrespectful. We are all different, with different backgrounds, different tastes, different kinks, different boundaries, different passions, and have one thing in common. We are all in the business of pleasure, but it's OUR business and we all can run it how we see fit. If you don't like the way I run my business, then I am sure if you look around, you will find someone you can work with. Let's not forget that we are humans and deserve respect. If you are looking for a sex doll, those are available for purchase. And if you want to be my sex doll....well that can be arranged.